Sunday, July 13, 2014

Fite 43- Hell Hath No Fury Like These Two Bastards (Jaxx vs. Sister Alice)

Okay everyone, we can't put this fite off anymore. For the benefit of the crowd, we have constructed large protective steel walls between the stands and the arena. We've done our best to protect the audience, referee, and our host. Enchantments have been cast, shamans have been bribed, symbols and wards have been placed. Tonight, we can only hope the fite stays within the confines of the arena, or else we all might be forced to go through a living hell.

These precautions are being taken because of tonight's two fiters, their destructive powers, and their all around apathy towards everyone who is here to witness the battle. One of them is Jaxx, a Sentinel whose powers pretty much go as far as he tries to push them. He brought with him two Berettas, but we doubt he'd even need two guns to kill anyone we could put in front of him.

His opponent for the evening is a blind nun. But not just any blind nun, Jaxx shall be fiting Sister "Black" Alice, a nun whose powers are mostly a mystery but she has been known to freak everyone out. She refused weapons, which makes us fear her even more, for she must have some trick up her sleeve if she is relying on her own strength and power to fite such a powerful foe.

But let us get this over with so we can go huddle in a corner and cry sooner rather than later. People, I am afraid to present for you the fite between Jaxx and Sister Alice. Time for you two to Fite Yer' Mate!
Sister Alice is standing in the middle of the arena, her blind eyes moving about but not seeing anything. Jaxx is leaning against one of the reinforced walls of the arena, smoking the last bit of an odd smelling cigarette. Looking directly at the nun, he takes a moment to try and see if she was readying any trickery. People seemed to always want to take him down because they had something to prove, so now he was wondering why this nun challenged him.

"What otherworldly shit are you smoking, you cowardly prick? Why don't you just land the first blow already, or are you afraid of a brittle old lady?" By the way, we forgot to mention: Viewer Discretion is Advised. These two competitors are pottymouths! The nun taunts the Sentinel, causing Jaxx to smoke the rest of the drug in an instant and began a slow walk over to the old lady. Sister Alice crosses her arms as Jaxx casually approaches her.

Jaxx walks right up to the old lady, until they are almost face to face. Neither of them moves for a while, Jaxx staring down the old woman, while Sister Alice stared right through him with her unseeing eyes. Jaxx felt a great pressure on his mind, but ignored it.

Jaxx jams his hand right into Sister Alice, but does not form a wound. He is not trying to hurt the nun's body, he's aiming for her soul, trying to reach into the abstract part of her that would house her spirit. His hand pops out of the other end grasping... Nothing.

"Looking for a soul?" Sister Alice laughs, and grabs Jaxx's arm, her fingernails digging into the flesh like iron claws... because apparently they are iron claws! Jaxx tries to pull his arm out of her, but it appears trapped in its abstract tomb after it failed to grasp a nonexistent soul. The fingernails tear flesh from the Sentinel's arm, but the pain seemed less than it should have been, even for a being so accustomed to it like Jaxx. Alice, though, seemed to be bending over in pain. She was absorbing some of the pain... but why?

"You think you got it tough, you overconfident brat? You've made your own bed, but I absorb the emotions of everyone around me, and I know exactly how to get into that sad excuse of a brain you have." Sister Alice takes his arm out of her body and jams her own arm into Jaxx's chest. Unlike Jaxx though, she doesn't have the ability to pluck souls from people's chests, so she ends up making a rather large, bloody hole in the man's solar plexus. She grasps one of his celiac ganglia, causing the Sentinel to wheeze as if the wind was knocked out of him.

"I know every fucked up thing you've done, boy, and I'm not impressed." Sister Alice begins slitting nerve fibers with her razor sharp nails, but Jaxx reaches towards the nun's arm. Holding the wrinkled wrist still, Jaxx brings his other hand down in a chop, severing the flesh and muscle up to a point, where his hand hits something.

"You have metal bones too, you cocky bitch?" Jaxx, instead of breaking the iron-like bone, bends it backwards so her hand pointed towards herself. The nun quickly kicked Jaxx in the naughty bits, causing him to let go and back off. Sister Alice tugged at the irregularly bent arm, but it appeared stuck in its odd new position. It's at this point that Jaxx draws his two pistols and opened fire on the old woman.

A couple bullets go into her habit and seem to disappear, but she quickly dodges the others with a quick forward burst of speed. She ends up right in front of Jaxx, and she exploits his brief moment of surprise to knock both pistols out of his hands. Black blood oozed out from within her habit, and veins on her head visibly throbbed from the duress of absorbing both of their pain and from the stress of moving so quickly. In fact, one of the veins on her forward seemed to be leaking a bit of thick black blood...

And then is when her empathic power lost its hold. The thoughts of almost one third of New York flowed into Jaxx's mind, causing him to stumble to the ground from the sudden mental assault. Sister Alice seemed a bit calmer now that the emotions of others where shared with her opponent, but unfortunately, Jaxx is not the only one to feel the effects. Members of the audience begin to cringe as the thoughts flow into their minds. It figures we didn't prepare well enough to block all of their powers...

Sister Alice goes to Jaxx, who is lying prone on the ground. Rather than going for some easy kill though, she begins to lecture him!
"You think you are pretty hot shit, don't you Jaxx? You always go around like you own the place because you tell a bunch of stories to spook the only people who would ever even consider calling you a friend. And what do you do to back up these stories? You get floored by a midget knight with an eating disorder and get your mind raped by a sheep with a hook. You get fucked over by the fat little girl who thinks she is the cutest thing god ever shat out, but you have the gall to act like everyone is alive because you said so.

You are easier to hurt than a legless puppy in a pit of needles. Your mind is just a paradise of angsty trash and you balance it out by telling everyone you don't give a shit, but in your head you bawl worse than a burning orphan. You build yourself up as a badass because you know we know you aren't all that, and then you go ripping people's souls out to prove you ain't got a tiny dick.

You killed god? Whoop dee fucking doo. Half the people I know have killed stronger beings, beings who could kill you without even trying. You sit around telling gross out stories of conquests like a 7 year old eating worms: You just want the fucking attention. One day you'll grow up and realize you are just an overcompensating wart on this universe's hide and do us the favor of blowing your own brains out."

Jaxx appeared to be on the verge of tears. Wait... he is crying! Holy crap! Someone has done the impossible! Someone had made Stonewall Jaxx cry!

Wait, Jaxx is standing up. He wipes away the few tears that did form and looks down at the ground, his eyes obscured by darkness.

Sister Alice readies to lay on more insulting and curse-riddled sentences when Jaxx's arm juts out and rips her jaw off. Her dark blood drips from the wound like molasses as Jaxx tosses her jaw off to the side and looks back up.

"You talk too much."

The thoughts of others still flowed through both of their heads. Banal thoughts about crushes and inside jokes are counteracted by the pains of traumatized victims of horrid crimes. It seemed, though, that both of them had learned to handle the extreme burden of carrying other people's thoughts in their heads. The crowd, of course, is another story, but our two competitors stood in the arena, motionless after Jaxx removed the nun's jaw.

Jaxx walks slowly towards her and then grabs the oddly bent hand, shaping it back to normal and shaking it mockingly.

"I have to hand it to you, you old broad. You sure know how to bore me. Your long-winded speech, did you plagiarize that? I've been getting shit like that for centuries, and just because you found out a new way to fuck with my head doesn't mean your rant is going to do any more to me than they did. By the way, I didn't cry because of your meaningless words. I cried because you smell like a shit-soaked onion."

Jaxx lets go of the arm and slugs the nun right in the face. Sister Alice is launched across the arena into one of the metal walls. Jaxx is quickly beneath her, catching her before she fell and jamming both of his arms into her stomach. Jaxx bends vital bones out of shape, but the nun seems unperturbed. She kicks off her shoes and jabs them forward, her surprisingly long toenails matching the sharpness of the nails on her fingers.

The nails tear holes into Jaxx's abdominals, causing his grip on the nun's bones to weaken enough for her to kick herself out of his grasp. She fell to the ground, the habit barely covering the obviously gaping wound now present in her midriff. Jaxx's Berettas reappear in his hands, and he begins unloading clips of ammunition into the nun on the ground.

The jawless old woman trembles from all the pain, but she is not done yet. She gathers her remaining strength and leaps up onto Jaxx. Her claws dig once more into his chest, which she tears open in a gory display. Ribs are heard cracking as the nun opens up Jaxx's midsection like she was about to perform a back alley open heart surgery on him. Jaxx cringed but still seemed able to stand despite the gallons of blood they both have lost in this fite.

The sister begins tearing apart organs with her claws, but Jaxx just smirks. He reaches out and grabs the nun's legs and yanks them off. "Hope that didn't give that fucking ghost host some sort of jollies," says Jaxx as he discard the legs and watches the nun fall off him and onto the ground. He jabs his fingers into her back and lifts her up.

"It's been a wonderfully boring time, you insufferable geezer, but I think its time to stop making these audience members puke from having to see your dry ass face." Jaxx begins to pull the nun apart, and as he does so, the blind eyes of the nun somehow seem to lose the light they never really had. Members of the audience feel relief from the pain her loose empathic powers inflicted on them as black blood begins spurting from the nun's habit. Jaxx is pulling the nun in two, and even against the metallic bones, he seems to have no trouble accomplishing the act.
Jaxx tosses aside the two halves of the nun, since he's been tossing her other parts to the side and might as well keep up the trend now that he's won the fite. Jaxx is about to leave the arena to do something about that gaping hole in his chest when Gezora stops him.

Its voice sounds oddly like Sister Alice's...
"You may have been able to beat me, but we both know the truth behind your life. If you had any guts you would just rip your own soul out right now and make everyone's life better, but we both know that cowardice plagues your mind like AIDS plagues Africa. This sad excuse for a referee is more brave than you. The moment your powers fail you, you end up retreating into the false belief that you can't die in hopes that believing it will make it true. One day you will get your comeuppance, and I'll be laughing my ass of when you do."

Whatever controlled Gezora left it, as did the nun get-up he briefly had inexplicably worn. Sister Alice released the cuttlefish, her last message to her opponent being delivered.

No comments:

Post a Comment