Tonight's Fite:
Brilliant Kid is already in the brand new Fite Yer' Mates arena, which is just the old Fite Yer' Mates arena with a concrete floor instead of a dirt one. Needless to say, the Kid finds this fantastic and is busy lauding it to no one in particular when Devil Ed walks in. Prior to entering the arena, Major Failure slipped him an odd porcelain sphere on a chain for use as a flail. Ed accepted it of course, but the hornets buzzing inside the sphere do give him cause for concern.
Approaching the brilliant young man, the half-angel begins to twirl his flail. The swooshing sound of spinning hornets alerts the Kid to his presence, and Brilliant Kid goes towards his hooded opponent.
"Well isn't this fellow brilliant? We agreed to a good match of hand-to-hand, and he just switches in a buzzing tetherball. It's pretty fantastic that he would think it is a good weapon, since every time I try to use toilet lids as weapons they bust apart. That weapon is asking for trouble in the hornet form. Well, let's see the swarm of fury you've got going, mate."
Devil Ed was put off a bit by this colloquy to seemingly no one, so his swinging flail slowed down, allowing Brilliant Kid an opening to grab Devil Ed and give him a noogie. Ed's hood bounced around his head, dangerously close to revealing his face, but Brilliant Kid stops, leaving Ed a bit flustered and embarrassed.
After adjusting his hood a bit, Ed takes a swing with his porcelain sphere, nailing the Kid in the chest. Brilliant Kid keels over, but luckily nothing vital was hit and no hornets escaped from the now cracked sphere. However, upon impact it was clear those bugs were ready to sting the living hell out of the next thing they saw. Kid pulled himself to his feet as Ed swung the flail above his head for some momentum. The young optimist laughed and kicked forward, hitting Ed in the shin and once more ending the orb's swinging. However, unlike last time the twirling ended, it now slammed down on Brilliant Kid's head, cracking open the sphere and letting out the swarm.
Brilliant Kid tumbled from the blow, but the hornets were quickly upon him. Ed watched with a malicious smirk on his face, but quickly that smirk turned to a gasp of terror. Once thing about these pissed off hornets: they serve no master. As Brilliant Kid tried to swat hornets off in a daze, Devil Ed began to run for his life from his own insect weaponry. Kid was soon racing away from the swarm as well, eventually passing by Devil Ed.
Brilliant Kid's charge through the hornets only left him with a few stings since he was also covered pretty well by his clothing. When he reached Devil Ed, he began to stomp on the curled up half-demon. Bruised and battered, Ed decided to risk the swarm of stings to retaliate. As soon as he uncurled from the fetal position, hornets swarmed towards his face, but as they approached, many began to die of supernatural causes. A few stung him, but Ed fought through them and began to trade blows with Brilliant Kid.
Devil Ed's hits were much stronger than his opponent's, but the Kid was much better than him at dodging. Although Ed was assaulted constantly with rabbit punches and jabs, every hit he landed on the Kid was a bone breaker. Brilliant Kid was forced onto the ground, where his back was punctured by porcelain shards. However, his quick-thinking mind realized that even if the flail was broken, its tough tungsten chain would still pack a wallop. Pulling the chain from the ceramic rubble, Brilliant Kid lashed out at Ed with it, nailing the half-angel's pink glowing eye.
Ed's eye exploded, and as the devil dealt with his own energy exploding forth from his augmented eyeball, the Kid took a moment to soliloquize once more.
"Isn't this fantastic? Even with all the hornets incapacitated, the fite is still full of brilliant twists! You never know who is going to come out on top in one of these things!"
Devil Ed gets his eye under control, but his face is scorched entirely on the right side. Ed struggles to see the Kid, who has now brandished the chain like a whip. The clanking of the chain's links alerted Ed to the swings he could no longer see, so he was still able to dodge. Ed tried to punch back at the Kid, but the optimist's weapon would smack his knuckles and wrists. Devil Ed struggled to keep his hands balled into fists, but the Kid's weapon was too strong for a near blind man.
Brilliant Kid thought ending the battle soon would be brilliant, so he devised a simple plan to incapacitate Devil Ed. Once more, he kicked forward, knocking Ed's shins and bringing him to his knees. With a fantastic twirl, the Kid swung the chain as powerfully as he could towards Ed's other eye.
Right before he could make contact, the devil grabbed the chain. Fighting through the pain of broken phalanges and the fresh sting of the chain's last swing, Ed began to try and tug the chain away from the Kid. The two briefly struggled over the metal, but Ed's battered hands gave out. Brilliant Kid fell backwards from the sudden end to the tug-o-war, the chain slipping out of his hands.
Ed quickly leaped towards it and brandished it. As Kid sat back up, Devil Ed wrapped the cool tungsten around his foe's neck and tightened it as hard as he could. His metallic noose strangled Brilliant Kid, whose hands futilely fumbled to try and pry his neck free. With a last few pitiful gasps of air, Brilliant Kid passes out.
DEVIL ED IS THE WINNER! HOW BRILLIANT!
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