Fite 3- Sea's the Day (Dudemanguy vs. Ogopogo)

Friends, Romans, interdimensional beings, lend me your ears! Fite Yer’ Mates is back for two rounds of wild and bloody battles! The first battle of the night will be an undersea fight for survival between the miniscule Dudemanguy and the massive Ogopogo! Let’s hope this lopsided battle isn’t over too quickly, because it is time to Fight Yer’ Mate!

Gezora and Dudemanguy are waiting on the seafloor for the arrival of the massive Canadian sea serpent. Whereas Dudemanguy’s position on the tip of a sunken rock is hard to see even from close range, the looming silhouette of Ogopogo is visible long before he’s arrived to the undersea arena.

When Ogopogo arrives to the battlefield,Gezora signals for the fight to begin. Dudemanguy begins to squirm on his rock perch! He waves his flag wildly, screaming to his opponent in an attempt to goad on the massive cryptid. Unfortunately, the sea slug’s tiny voice fails to reach his opponent’s ears or anybody's more than a few feet away, so the words are lost to the depths.

Ogopogo doesn’t waste any time though, and whips his massive tail around and brings it down like a flyswatter on the slug’s rock with a massive thud and a spray of bubbles. The lake monster is quick to pull his tail back up and check it. He knows his opponent will try to board his fifty foot long body, and he’s not going to let the slug hitch a ride on his rear end. But surprisingly, his opponent is nowhere to be found…

A tiny figure can barely be seen a few feet above the sea serpent’s head. Having barely dodged being squished by the leviathan’s tail, the bubble spray carried Dudemanguy far up into the water and is now bringing him down straight onto his foe’s face. By the time Ogopogo finally realizes to look upwards, it’s too late. Dudemanguy thrusts his flag's pointy end straight towards his foe’s face!

The flag punctures the Canadian cryptid’s left eye! Ogopogo thrashes about trying to shake the mollusk and his red flag free from his face, but Dudemanguy holds onto the flag for dear life. Ogopogo whips his tail to his face and attempts to flip the sea slug off his face spatula-style, but the flag just won’t come dislodged from Ogopogo’s eye!

*POP*

Suddenly, Dudemanguy is thrown off the monster's scaly face, but he’s brought more than just his red flag with him. The entire left eye has come with him!

Ogopogo screams in pain and lunges face-first towards his tiny opponent. The slug is barely able to dislodge the eyeball from his flag before the massive maw of Ogopogo envelops his entire body and clamps down!

Luckily, the tiny body of the sea slug manages to slip through the serpent’s sharp teeth unharmed. Ogopogo’s forked tongue begins to jab at his tiny foe, who starts to crawl towards the back of the mouth. From the outside, it looks a bit like he’s trying to dislodge a popcorn kernel from his molars…

The forked tongue manages to slam the slug against the side of a canine, knocking the tiny flag out of his hands and sending it tumbling down Ogopogo’s throat. Dudemanguy is now left weaponless, but he thinks on whatever one would call his feet and grabs the tooth he was slammed against and tugs wildly at it. The forked tongue continues its assault, slamming the nudibranch against the very tooth he is trying to dislodge.

Despite being dazed from the repeated battery by a tongue three times his size, the gastropod finally dislodges the canine and quickly brings it down on Ogopogo’s tongue. The tip of the tongue is severed and Ogopogo emits another wail of anguish, opening his mouth and letting a stream of blood and a chunk of his tongue flow out into the open ocean. The cryptid has grown tired of his foe’s internal battle and swims down to the seafloor and gulps up a mouthful of sand and swallows, pushing the mollusk down into the esophagus! But then Ogopogo realizes…

“That was a terrible idea…”

Dudemanguy struggles to right itself in the sand and then jabs the tooth into the lining of the Canadian cryptid’s esophagus. The marine mollusk continues to slide down the esophagus, creating a long gash in the side as the tooth cuts easily through the soft lining. The tooth eventually becomes stuck, leaving Dudemanguy dangling above the cavernous stomach of the lake monster. Ogopogo knows his stomach acid could dissolve the slug in seconds, but he can’t risk anymore internal damage.

Ogopogo realizes what he must do.

The tail of the beast once again draws towards its face, but this time, it goes into his open mouth. It goes back into the mouth until it triggers the gag reflex. In a nasty display that would make even the most-hardened bulimic cringe, Ogopogo induces vomiting.

The sea slug can only look on in terror as the stomach churns beneath him and then sends a rush of fluid back up through the damaged esophagus. The lake monster cringes from the pain of stomach acid hitting the esophagus’s gaping hole. But Dudemanguy, as well as a stream of vomit, emerges from Ogopogo’s mouth.

At this point, Dudemanguy has been disarmed twice, but he’s not given up yet! He begins to go straight for his foe’s nostrils, aiming for a new route for his internal attacks!

But Ogopogo has grown tired of this slug’s brand of crap, and opens his mouth once more to once again attempt to chomp down on his foe!

But once again he fails! Dudemanguy whips just out of the reach of his foe’s teeth, close enough to see a slight reflection in the well-polished incisors of the lake monster. Dudemanguy attempts to swim up to the nostrils, but Ogopogo isn’t stupid enough to let him get there. The mouth opens once more, leans forward about an inch more, and clamps down again.

Dudemanguy isn’t as lucky this time.

Ogopogo finally sinks his teeth into his small opponent, nearly cutting the gastropod in half with the force of his bite. He eases his jaw and lets two Nurse Sharks carry the corpse away, presumably to live up to their names and heal him.

Ogopogo has won this fight under the sea, and after a bit of internal surgery and some facial reconstruction, he’ll be ready to reenter the ring. However, Gezora has a fight back on land he needs to attend, and it looks like he’s hitched a ride back.